I was at a karaoke bar last night and heard a guy belt out Eminem’s “Lose Yourself”, a song that elevated Eminem to American industrial royalty when it was featured in a post-bankruptcy Superbowl ad for the new Chrysler 200 sedan. After his performance I took a sip of my beer and remarked to friends, “I suddenly feel like buying a Chrysler.”
Tapping into Eminem’s catalog aligned the brand with themes of rebirth while the latest ad connects the Chrysler 300 to the city’s glamorous musical heritage:
Cynics such as myself would note that in the recent past, GM, Ford, and Chrysler have used and abused images of post-war prosperity and less than subtle “We are America!” declarations to hawk steaming turds to the public, trading on their past achievements and using nostalgia to guilt customers into products with quality issues and lackluster designs.
I can say with confidence, however, especially after driving the 2012 Chrysler 300 for myself, that this ambitious advertisement is no shallow gimmick. With its silky 3.6L Pentastar V6, plush leather seats, 8-speed transmission, confident handling, and distinctly sculpted sheet metal, it achieves many of the lofty promises of its emotional marketing. Additionally, a 470-horsepower 6.4L V8 is available to muscle enthusiasts while the standard 300-horsepower 8-speed/V6 combo is capable of 31mpg, impressive economy for such a large sedan.
The new 300’s interior, additionally, is a significant improvement from the previous car, abandoning a stark and plasticky interior for one with gracefully curved panels, elegant glacier blue lighting, and trim pieces made of real metal. Completing the package is UConnect, a refreshingly logical and straightforward touch screen infotainment system that complements natural buttons and knobs rather than replacing them.
It’s quite a change for a company that suffocated after nearly a decade of German mismanagement at the hands of Daimler-Benz.
Tough it may be dangerously ambitious to compare a mass-market sedan to the haunting timbre of Diana Ross’s voice and the artistic accomplishments of Motown Records, it’s nice to be reminded of what American creativity and hard work can accomplish. This is what good advertising does — it tells a story with emotion and sincerity.
At the auction I sampled several cars today including a 2012 Chrysler 300 V6, Mercedes-Benz C350 Sport, BMW X5 4.6, 1992 Cadillac Eldorado, and 2007 Lexus SC430 (recently named “Worst Car In The World” by Top Gear).
I climbed behind the wheel of a 2009 Audi Q7 V8, the worst-built modern automobile I have ever had the misfortune of driving. At 66,000 miles, the arm rests, door panels, and dashboard creaked like the shutters of a 100 year old abandoned house.
The center arm rest wobbled back and forth while providing audible feedback in the form of squeaks, groans, and rattles. Pulling the handle to shut the door produced yet another creaking noise, and leaning back or side to side in the seat produced yet another series of cheap, plasticky sounds.
The buttons on the MMI knob, radio, and climate controls felt chintzy and hollow while the Bang and Olufsen premium sound system paled in comparison to the HK Logic7 system used in most Land Rovers, Mercedes-Benzes, and BMWs. There was plenty of bass and plenty of treble yet none of it was pleasing to listen to. The motorized tweeters that rise up from the dashboard are a neat little trick, however.
Additionally, the MMI knob moves up the list of menu items when you rotate right and down the menu when you rotate left, a frustrating configuration that’s unnatural and opposite of other luxury cars that use similar interfaces. The display itself comes across as cheap and unsophisticated with large pixels and jagged text.
Rolling down the road, it rattled furiously like a sack full of Lego pieces. It was noisy enough to prompt me to ask my friend if he noticed any loose cargo in the rear. After pulling over to check, there was nothing found and the rear hatch door, once fully opened, wobbled like a table with uneven feet.
On the plus side, the 350-horsepower 4.2L V8 developed a high-pitched, racy roar at full throttle complemented by strong and responsive brakes. The third row seats are easy to fold down by pulling one strap to fold the head rest and one latch to drop the seat. Of course, the power folding third rows in the Lincoln Navigator and Infiniti QX56 are preferred.
Pros: Engine, brakes, and styling.
Cons: Deplorable build quality.
Conclusion: Anyone who paid $60,000+ for a new Q7 was ripped off. Badly.
One might assume that after the bailouts of General Motors and Chrysler by the Obama administration, that auto enthusiasts and workers, especially of domestic brands, would overwhelmingly be supporting President Obama.
Traditionally, men and women who make their living from the auto business have favored Republicans. Though it was Republican Richard Nixon who created the EPA, Democrats in congress and in the media have often pointed fingers at America’s big three for failing to be more like Honda and Toyota, building trucks and SUVs instead of politically correct hybrids.
Of course, this criticism ignores the fact that Toyota, Honda, and Nissan build and sell the Tundra, Ridgeline, and Titan in America, respectively, which failed to achieve projected sales due to stiff competition from Chrysler, Ford, and GM. Additionally, the Japanese have expanded far into the SUV market with highly competent three-row behemoths like the Infiniti QX56 and the Toyota Sequoia, not to mention the long-running and globally popular Toyota Land Cruiser and Lexus LX.
While Japan should be commended for building quality trucks and SUVs that suit American tastes, it certainly makes them no less culpable for the politically incorrect “crime” of building large, comfortable, and safe multipurpose trucks.
Liberal journalists like Michelle Maynard blamed Detroit’s predicament on its product mix rather than multiple generations of burdensome legacy costs. Foreign-owned auto plants that have opened in the US, particularly in the south, are immune to the lure of the UAW, with employees preferring to deal directly with management. After witnessing the decline of their domestic competitors at the hands of overly aggressive union leaders, who could blame them?
Today, Democrats who praise the president for saving Detroit are part of the same crowd who called for the downfall of America’s “filthy” auto industry just a decade earlier. I have a hard time believing that the Prius-driving schmucks sporting Obama/Biden stickers were as supportive of Michigan as they claim to be now. Before 2008, they smugly referred to the industrial midwest as “flyover states.”
These are the people who regulated, strangled, and berated Detroit into a corner and now claim full credit for its rescue. It’s like dating someone who beats the shit out of you but pitches in for your cable bill.
Not all Democrats are alike, obviously, and surprisingly, President Jimmy Carter was an exception to the norm, delaying increases in safety and emission regulations to help Detroit catch up to the fuel crisis… the crisis caused in part by America’s expansive foreign policy.
Of course, Detroit does indeed deserve its own share of blame. The relentless focus on light trucks came at the expense of car development, catching them off guard as fuel prices suddenly rose. Part of this was due to the CAFE loophole that counted the fuel consumption of light trucks separately from cars, enabling manufacturers to build trucks that were more in line with full size sedans and wagons that Americans traditionally preferred, but with the addition of all-weather capability and a commanding driving position.
The 1995 Chevy Caprice Wagon was capable of 23mpg while the 1995 Ford Explorer 4×4 was good for 18mpg at most. Additionally, the Caprice was capable of carrying eight passengers compared to the Explorer’s five and offered greater cargo capacity. Unfortunately due to CAFE regulations and the resulting emergence of the profitable SUV, low demand for large cars sent GM’s full-size offerings to the history books.
The policies we trusted had a detrimental, unexpected effect.
Republicans are culpable as well. Though Mitt Romney was opposed to the sweetheart deal that the UAW received during the Obama administration’s bailouts of Chrysler and GM, he was still open to providing government assistance after a normal, managed bankruptcy was completed. So much for conservatives being advocates of free markets.
Most significantly, however, is the way car guys tend to have an independent streak. Driving, owning, and maintaining your own vehicle is like having a pair of running legs. Car guys prefer to have the ability to stand up and run around on their own than wait on a corner for the government to pick them up and cart them around.
For the most dedicated auto enthusiasts, the automobile is more than a means of conveyance. It’s hands, heart, and soul, a part of who you are and how you assert yourself to the world. As a result, their politics tend to be similarly aligned, favoring free markets, small government, and a country that values individualism and independence.
For proof of this, look at the data provided by OpenSecrets.org. Of the nearly three million dollars donated to campaigns by people in the auto industry or related PACs, 85% went to Mitt Romney. Most of Romney’s support has been from car dealers, some of whom believe President Obama closed dealerships with strong Republican ties. Though that wasn’t explicitly true, more rural dealers than necessary were closed, reducing a steady base that GM and Chrysler had in markets that were mostly untouched by foreign competitors.
Despite clear allegiances among motoring enthusiasts, not all gearheads are alike. I will be voting for Gary Johnson on Tuesday, November 6, here in Missouri.
In October I joined a friend on a trip to Phoenix, Santa Maria CA, Los Angeles, and Las Vegas. He was looking for a high-end sedan, preferably a BMW 7-series, Mercedes S-class, or Mercedes CL, to purchase and drive back to Missouri for resale, so I tagged along for free.
During our time there, we rented a Volkswagen Passat and two Ford Fusions, driving up and down the west and southwest on a search for new and classic cars. A month earlier, I traveled to Long Beach for the 2012 Japanese Classic Car Show where I rented a 2012 Chevy Malibu.
Leaving Lambert Field in St Louis, MO.
“Southwest Classic” is code for “really old plane, good luck.”
Upon landing in Phoenix, my friend Becky picked us up and took us to Surprise AZ where she and her husband Greg, owner/founder of NICOClub.com, generously hosted us at their home for two days while we did some car shopping. They generously put up with my snoring, treated us to delightful southern cooking, and offered their Nissan Frontier and Honda Insight so we could get around town.
After passing on a 2008 Mercedes CL (repaint) and a maroon S-class (unpleasant salesman), we decided to rent a car and drive to Las Vegas to enjoy some entertainment and continue our car shopping. We booked online with Alamo and picked up a beautiful white Volkswagen Passat at the Phoenix airport.
3rd Place: 2012 Volkswagen Passat
When we first sat down in the Passat (Alamo lets you pick your own car from the lot), my friend Ian actually thought it was a Jetta. I wasn’t sure I believed him because I remembered the new Jetta having a small back seat and a particularly cheap interior, and the car we were sitting in felt slightly upscale and pleasantly well made.
He dropped me outside of Sky Harbor’s rental complex where I parked the truck and as he drove off, I saw the Passat badge. I knew I was right. In fairness, Passat and Jetta do appear quite similar.
This year (2012), the Passat is all new for the United States. In 2011, Europeans received the real successor to the Passat while here in the states, we received a different car by the same name, built in Tennessee and $8000 cheaper than its predecessor. This larger, cheaper version is also built and sold in China and South Korea.
Due to the declining value of the US dollar against the Euro, the old Passat was priced thousands of dollars more than its competition. A well-optioned 4-cylinder Honda Accord could be had for thousands of dollars less than a similarly equipped base model Passat, forcing the Volkswagen brand into a small niche, never achieving more than a 2% share of the US market.
As a somewhat premium brand (a status mandated by pricing), Volkswagen had difficulty expanding beyond its core audience of cute college girls in Jettas and individualists who flocked to the expressive New Beetle. You could think of Volkswagen as Apple right before Steve Jobs returned, building costly, polished products that lacked mass market appeal.
After years of lackluster sales, Volkswagen altered its US strategy, building a new plant in Chattanooga which introduced a new Jetta and Passat, cheaper, larger, and softer models tailored for the US market.
The result was similar to what happened when Apple introduced the stylish, bargain-priced iMac in 1998. VW’s premium image became available to the masses at non-premium prices with customers flocking to showrooms, quadrupling in sales volume over outgoing models.
Most of the dramatic price cut is due to US production, avoiding costly US-EU currency conversions while employing non-union American workers. Other savings were achieved by downgrading the interior, replacing some of the outgoing Passat’s premium soft-touch surfaces with hard plastics.
Still, the cabin presents itself as an upscale-leaning motoring environment with beautiful LED lighting and luxurious knobs, switches, and displays. The tasteful colors, lights, and fonts used throughout the cabin suggest Audi more than Volkswagen, and even parked alongside an Audi A6 it would take a brief moment to tell the two cars apart.
Easily, the new Passat’s interior and exterior are the most upscale-reaching of midsize family cars.
The Passat grows in size with a limousine-like back seat that draws comparisons to larger cars like the Chevy Impala, Chrysler 300, and Ford Taurus. Thanks to the its traditional three-box sedan shape, a six-footer can sprawl out in the back seat without feeling like a fat guy flying coach.
With cloth seats, satellite radio, a 170hp 2.5L I5 engine, and 6-speed automatic, the 2012 Passat we rented from Alamo would have retailed for just under $23,000, undercutting the CVT-equipped Honda Accord by $400. What we have, then, is a plus-sized car with a semi-premium interior at a bargain-basement price, and Americans love bargains, especially when it comes to size.
Though I commend the build quality of the Passat with its elegant lighting, durable switchgear, and precisely installed interior and exterior panels, I did find one defect. A wire was hanging down from underneath the climate control unit.
Though this minor flaw was fairly insignificant, over time I can see the edge of the plastic housing cutting slowly into the wire insulation.
This was, as far as I could tell, the only apparent defect. The Passat’s other flaws were design-related, especially the narrow front seat seat bottoms which proved to be terribly uncomfortable. For the passenger sitting directly forward it was fine, but for the driver with his left foot planted on the dead pedal, you had to cross your leg over the large side bolster of the bottom cushion, resulting in a sleepy foot and numb thigh after an hour of driving.
For all of Volkswagen’s bragging about the Passat being right-sized for America, this narrow chair was a rather unfortunate oversight.
Additionally, the Passat’s driving dynamics were nothing special. The aging 2.5L inline-5 wheezes about like a tired old dog, exhibiting little eagerness as it lazily climbed the rev range. The automatic transmission performed its duties in the hilly parts of rural Arizona and Nevada admirably, downshifting on command and responding well to changing elevations, but around town it was too eager to upshift, killing the fun of stoplight launches.
The overly eager upshifting, fortunately, does translate into respectable fuel economy, 31.9 “instant mpg” on the highway and 26 mpg calculated by hand for the entire tank.
And although the steering had a weighty, substantive feel at low speeds, it was slightly vague on the highway with a numb on-center feel, not mushy but noticeably imprecise.
The front-strut, multilink rear suspension was pleasingly supple around the city streets of Phoenix and Las Vegas but painfully sloppy around corners, leaning over on its rocker panels like a Chevy Impala. It seemed as if the Passat wanted to be a firm, sporty sedan, but VW’s engineers chose to separate the car from the pavement with a pile of marshmallows.
In Las Vegas we headed south on Frank Sinatra Dr (pictured above and below), approaching a left turn hook that a Fusion, Malibu, or any other standard car would be able to handle gracefully. The Passat leaned hard to the right, tires squealing like pigs in a burning barn, and plowed into the right lane before I hit the mushy brake pedal and regained control. This was clearly not a driver’s car.
The rental-grade 2012 Chevy Impala, unfortunately, is what the 2.5L Passat’s driving dynamics compare to, except the Impala at least has GM’s excellent 3.6L V6. If you’re into floaty, old-tech cars with wheezy engines and sloppy brakes, consider the Passat your slightly roomier, more upscale alternative. Otherwise, I expect more from something that carries a VW badge. This stylish car is a better place to sleep than it is to drive.
While in Vegas, we took a look at another S-class (price wasn’t right) and I met up with a friend from Washington who flew in with his wife and some friends to celebrate his birthday — an outstanding coincidence.
After an outstanding weekend in Las Vegas, including a David Copperfield show, the bland Passat was quickly forgotten.
Second Place: 2012 Ford Fusion
We returned to Phoenix from Las Vegas and changed rental companies to lock in a lower rate, choosing a smaller firm called Fox Rentacar. Unfortunately, the trade-off is that their fleet is older and with that age comes a few minor issues.
Like Alamo, you’re free to choose any vehicle in a given class. At first, I wanted to take a black Mazda 6 (pictured above, left) to California but it lacked satellite radio which Ian insisted on. As a result, we ended up in a silver Fusion.
(A Dodge Avenger was also available, but who wants to suffer on a vacation?)
I have always been a fan of both the Mazda 6 and Ford Fusion, two dynamically excellent cars built on the same platform that are more fun to drive than the average family car. Compared to the stodgy Taurus, the sharply-styled Fusion was a breath of fresh air.
The Fusion’s angular styling draws minor comparisons to the edgy Cadillac CTS and ten-spoke wheels on our SEL look as if they were pulled from a Mustang GT. On the other hand, some see the three-bar chrome grille as a mass of reflective metal that draws its inspiration from Gillette razors.
Twin tail pipes are nicely finished in chrome, tucked underneath a rear bumper cover that turns upward at the bottom for cleaner aerodynamics.
Up front there’s plenty of room for two large Americans. I immediately took notice of the white contrast stitching on the leather seats and arm rest, completely unnecessary but tremendously pleasing design details that give the midsize Ford an upscale look and feel.
Even the door panels were thickly padded on the sides and arm rests with the only hard plastics found at the far bottom and far front sections, a nice upgrade over the Passat which had a larger quantity of hard surfaces.
The compromise, unfortunately, is in the rear. The Fusion’s platform is adapted from the Japanese and Euro-centric Mazda 6 which lends it a smaller wheelbase than the made-for-America Volkswagen Passat. Rear passengers will encounter a shorter, lower seat cushion with noticeably less leg room. Still, it compares reasonably well to the Accord, Camry, and Malibu and a parent should have no trouble dealing with a rear child seat in the space available.
Additionally, the narrower cabin offers less room to stretch out with the driver’s knees resting up against the unusually wide center stack. And that center stack is a ridiculous mess of buttons, buttons, and more buttons.
Traditionally, Fords have offered some of the simplest and most logical fan, radio, and climate controls with three sets of knobs for the fan, vent flaps, and temperature and two knobs for the volume and tuner. Unfortunately, in the Fusion, the fan knob is replaced by up and down buttons while the ventilation flaps are controlled by an array of tiny buttons crammed into the bottom of the stack. We never really got used to it as it required your eyes to be removed from the road as you peered over the little icons.
Ford also had a tradition of presenting information in the plainest, most logical way possible with adequately lit needles and gauges marked with plain sans-serif fonts that quietly said “Peoria.”
The Fusion, however, abandons decades of functional simplicity in favor of garish cyan blue lighting that draws its inspiration from video games. If this was Ford’s way of making up for the stodgy, boring gauge clusters found in the Taurus and Explorer, then they went overboard. It’s as if Nicki Minaj was tapped for design inspiration.
Fortunately, those shortcomings are made up for by Sync, a brilliant method of combining in-car audio with the modern capabilities of smartphones. Bluetooth pairing with the iPhone 5 is quick and painless with clear call quality and reasonably accurate voice recognition, though some artists could not be interpreted by voice.
Satellite radio functionality was a bit confusing, using both the tuning knob and the four-way seek button in the center. Fortunately, the electroluminescent display was easy to read with large, well-arranged text. The far left displays the current climate control setting and compass position while the far right shows the outdoor temperature. The top line is used for the climate, connectivity modes, and source displays.
You can call up genres, artists, or song titles by voice in English, French, or Spanish. More advanced versions of SYNC support navigation, SMS reading, voice dialing, and custom ringtones.
Most importantly, music sounds incredible with thunderous, trench-deep bass and highs that glisten and sparkle with impressive clarity. It’s almost enough to make up for this car’s greatest flaw, the obnoxious MyKey system.
In theory, MyKey is the ultimate implementation of vehicle safety and security, preventing valet drivers from going on triple-digit joyrides and keeping teenagers within normal highway speed limits. Unfortunately, MyKey is seldom configured correctly in most rental fleets, resulting in electronic speed limiters (75 mph in our case) that make it dangerous to pass slow-moving vehicles and get out of dangerous highway traffic situations.
As we approached 75 mph, the Fusion beeped and ceased to accelerate no matter how hard we pressed the throttle. This obnoxious feature was not necessarily enabled by Fox Rentacar. Any user with one of the master keys can play with the configuration menu and turn the master key into a slave key, enabling the speed limiter in the process. The only solution is to use the other master key (which we didn’t have on hand) to override the setting.
As we traveled up the California coast I did my best to look for solutions. People suggested disconnecting the battery and pulling fuses but I learned that the setting was stored in the PCM and could not be bypassed without the master key.
In retrospect that worked out fine since we discovered an obnoxious wheel bearing vibration and low speeds were probably safer anyway. After being on hold with Fox for an eternity we decided to put up with the problem until we got back to Phoenix.
We stopped in Lompoc, California and stayed at a Days Inn for a few days while we waited for the paperwork for a BMW 7-series to go through. To my surprise, the BMW was quite bland, not only to look at but to drive as well.
The coast, however, was strikingly beautiful. We checked out the beach which featured a coastal Amtrak station.
At the last minute, Ian changed his mind on the car and we left town. On the way back, his business partner called and asked him to look at a couple BMW 2002s. That’s when we met up with the founder of Socal Vintage BMW and took a 1974 2002 for a spin. More on that later.
One additional annoyance was the visor peg that mounted from the front rather than the rear. Whenever I tried to reinsert the visor peg I found myself banging it on the back of the hook until I noticed my error. Why such a simple, obviously thing designed this way is beyond me.
Welcome to California, the only state that stops you upon entry and asks if you have any fruit.
As night fell the Fusion’s cabin turned into a night club (a night club that played Phil Collins). Around the front and back of the interior, an option on the SEL, were LED lights that illuminated the foot wells and cupholders.
A decade ago I remembered someone I knew putting LED lounge lights in his Mitsubishi Eclipse, a trendy thing to do among the ricer crowd. Apparently Ford caught on and took it mainstream.
I’ve never seen pretzels and Diet Coke illuminated in such a vulgar, boorish way. Fortunately, we discovered that a button on the very bottom of the crammed center stack (labeled with an inexplicable sun and moon icon) allowed the illumination to be changed to other colors or disabled entirely. I chose a much less obnoxious shade of dark blue that provided a sufficient level of light without making the inside of the car look like Larry Flynt’s Hustler Club.
While the Passat was at times painfully conservative, the Fusion was conversely obnoxious, trying its best to be edgy by laying it on thick with superficial bullshit.
That said, as a car, and by a car I mean a breathing, mechanical machine that responds to human input, the Ford Fusion is an outstanding way to travel, genuine fun to throw around corners and quick to respond to steering inputs, not to mention superbly comfortable on long-trips whether it’s on flat, wide interstates or winding narrow roads.
The Fusion’s double-wishbone front suspension works wonders, tucking and digging in to tight corners while offering a smooth and compliant ride on all kinds of surfaces. All of this is motoring pleasure is expected for a car that traces its lineage to excellent drivers like the Mazda 6, Mazda 626, Mazda MX-6, and Ford Probe.
Averaging 30.8 mpg on our trip to California was yet another delightful bonus.
Unfortunately, where the Fusion falls short is in the implementation of the 6F35 6-speed automatic, mated to the I4 and 3.0L V6 starting in 2010. A combination of mechanical and software issues have resulted in occasionally lumpy or harsh shifts.
The contrast-stitched leather, brilliant sound system, clever SYNC interface, comfortable seats, high crash test ratings, excellent visibility, and sharp styling are all icing on one hell of a cake, but the transmission issues on certain 2010-2012 models make it hard to recommend the certain versions of the Fusion.
If you want one, find a 3.5L V6 with the Aisin TF-80 6-speed automatic instead of the 3.0L or 2.5L with Ford’s 6F35. In addition to being more dependable, the 3.5L Fusion is quicker to 60 mph (under 7 seconds) and more powerful.
We gave the Fusion another chance after we left California and returned to Phoenix, picking up a less-optioned model with fewer miles for a trip to Tucson AZ where where inspected a 1970s BMW 2002 (more on that later). It lacked SYNC, leather, automatic climate controls, selectable interior lighting, and heated seats but still offered satellite radio.
Thankfully, this one was not plagued by MyKey settings, transmission issues, or wheel bearing vibrations. Compared to the almost-loaded SEL, we also lost the leather-wrapped steering wheel and some padded interior surfaces.
We also lost the exterior temperature display, fake carbon fiber trim, and compass.
For me, the absence of those features was a positive. The manual climate controls were much easier to use, the selectable lighting in the SEL was ridiculous, and the lively steering and sharp handling remained in tact. It’s reassuring to know that after being stripped of its superfluous frivolities, the Fusion retains all of its style and driving enjoyment.
On the way to Tucson, to look at a 1976 BMW 2002, I dozed off in the passenger seat again, enjoying the Fusion’s compliant ride and thickly padded seats. More on the BMW later.
For 2013, the all new Fusion loses its double wishbone suspension in favor of more conventional Macpherson struts, though Ford insists that the new car is intended for drivers. It also gains more elegant styling and abandons the aging naturally aspirated Duratec engines in favor of Ford’s latest Ecoboost turbos. Technologically, the new Fusion ushers in a new era of efficiency and design. Dynamically, I hope Ford hasn’t abandoned driving fun in favor of total refinement.
First Place: 2012 Chevrolet Malibu
Introduced in 2008, this particular generation of Malibu was Chevy’s first fully competent and genuinely impressive family car to come along in several decades. I rented this car from Hertz on a separate trip I took to California earlier in the year, and you can read the full reviewwith photos and detailed ratingshere.
Compared to the 2012+ Passat and 2006-2012 Fusion, the Malibu looks more upscale with its thick C-pillar, German-influenced formal roofline, straight beltline, and muscular wheel arches. The body looks sculpted and strong without being fat, owing to its long wheelbase, long rear overhang, and narrow dimensions.
Unfortunately, the styling comes at the cost of ingress and egress, causing tall people to hit their heads on the roof and pillars when climbing in. The slightly narrow cabin also results in a tighter back seat in terms of width, but it makes up for it with generous leg room, straddling the difference between the Fusion and Passat without compromising on the depth and length of the rear seat cushion.
The new 2013 Malibu that replaces this car takes a different approach, shortening the back seat while widening it to appeal to a global audience. While that may be beneficial for the rare occasions you have three people sitting across the rear bench and may make parallel parking easier in, say, a British village, it makes the cabin feel more cramped and makes installing a child seat a bit more cumbersome.
Click the link below for a complete write-up on the 2012 Malibu, written last year.
Interestingly, though the purpose of this trip was to buy a car, we ended up coming home in a 1991 Buick Riviera that I found on Craigslist in Phoenix. More on that later.
Powertrain: Passat – 4/10 – The 2.5L 170hp I-5 that powers much of VW’s lineup is lazy, gutless, and unrewarding. The 6-speed transmission is reasonably responsive when called to action but too prone to upshifting in routine driving. Fusion – 6/10 – Ford’s 3.0L Duratec V6, despite its age, is adequately powerful. Unfortunately, the homegrown 6F35 6-speed automatic is prone to odd behaviors. Malibu – 8/10 – The 6T40 6-speed automatic transmission makes the best of GM’s 169-hp 2.4L Ecotec engine. Unlike its sibling, the Saturn Aura, the Malibu is often in the right gear, rarely hunting or searching. Shifts are pleasingly smooth but perceptible enough to offer a bit of feedback. Gearing is nearly perfect though the 2.4L Ecotec I-4 can be raspy at high revs.
Braking: Passat – 4/10 – After shoving your foot through a mushy pedal, the car dives forward like an ocean liner. Fusion – 9.5/10 – Sharp, steady, and athletic. Malibu – 9/10 – Strong and progressive.
Ride: Passat – 10/10 – The Passat rides as if it’s suspended in a bowl of thick white country gravy. Supple and steady on the highway. Fusion – 9/10 – An excellent balance of sport and comfort, never harsh but pleasingly firm. Malibu – 9/10 – Quietly sturdy in a way that brings to mind German sport sedans with a nice balance between American-style smoothness and European firmness.
Steering/Handling: Passat – 4/10 – The soft suspension that lends the Passat a Rolls Royce-like ride also turns it into a queasy, sloppy handler even in city driving. Steering is also a bit numb on center. Fusion – 9.5/10 – The Fusion was born for curves with quick steering and a firm but compliant ride. From a driver’s perspective, the Fusion feels like a lively Japanese sport sedan. Malibu – 8.5/10 – While it may lack the on-paper handling prowess of a BMW, it offers the feel of a car that’s imported from Germany. Through sweeping curves and banked on-ramps, mild body roll serves as an indicator of grip rather than a symptom of queasiness. The steering could offer more feedback, something the Mazda 6 and Ford Fusion excel at.
Audio/Accessories: Passat – 5/10 – For a near-base model, the 2.5L Passat comes equipped with a pleasing if not mind-blowing sound system with MP3 playback, auxiliary input, a clever multifunction digital display built into the gauge cluster, steering wheel controls, power mirrors, manual seats, and Bluetooth audio streaming. A Fender premium sound system is optional. A basic alarm still costs an additional $325, a strange omission. For the same price, the Honda Accord includes dual zone climate control, Pandora streaming, a backup camera, and an alarm among other features. Despite moving production to the US and dropping 8 grand off the price, the Passat still comes up short on features and options for the money. Fusion – 9/10 – The Fusion SEL comes packed with everything but the kitchen sink and an unusually pleasant sound system. Unfortunately, climate and audio controls are sometimes difficult to use and the interior is a mess of poorly organized buttons. SYNC is a nice touch. Malibu – 6.5/10 – When this review was initially written last year, the Malibu seemed well-equipped for 2012. Now, especially after reexamining the Fusion, the Malibu comes up short in connectivity, though this was remedied for 2013 when the debut of the new Malibu. The Malibu’s radio display looks a bit dated as well compared to the competition, even from a year ago. Fortunately, everything is easy to use and the standard GM radio is punchy, powerful, and bright, though it doesn’t match the Fusion’s glistening clarity. The 110-volt electrical outlet on the center console is a nice touch.
Interior: Passat – 8/10 – Though it loses some soft-touch surfaces compared to the previous Passat, the elegant lighting and tasteful displays lend an upscale feel missing from the competition. The analog clock is a nice bonus. Fusion – 5.5/10 – Fake carbon fiber trim, garish looking gauges, and cheesy interior lights come across as amateurish, as if the Fusion’s interior designers spent a day at Autozone pulling accessories off the shelf. While it is a comfortable place to sit, it isn’t so great to look at. The door panels and seats feature beautiful stitched leather and padded vinyl, so while the design is weak the quality is high. Malibu – 7/10 – Showing its age, the Malibu doesn’t have as many soft-touch surfaces as its competitors, but what it lacks in softness it makes up for with lots of storage, faux-suede “ultralux” seating surfaces, and a dual-cowl configuration that creates a feeling of space between the front seats and the windshield. The bright wood trim that curves from door to door is an elegant touch. The back seat is a bit too dark and cave-like due to the thick C-pillar and high door sills, but the long and supportive seat bottoms help make the rear a comfortable place to be.
Comfort: Passat – 7/10 – Narrow seat bottoms make road trips an uncomfortable burden. Rear leg room is limousine-like and sure to please back seat passengers. The driver’s seat gets a 4/10 while the rear earns a 10. Fusion – 8/10 – Front seats are an ideal blend of comfort and sport though the back seat could use additional thigh support and leg room. The wide center console intrudes into leg room. I dozed off peacefully in the passenger seat for several hours. Malibu – 8/10 – Front seats are well-bolstered with excellent thigh support. Adjustable lumbar on lower trim levels would be nice, but the default configuration is perfect for long-distance trips or hours spent idling in California traffic. The driver gets a power seat adjuster with manual rake.
Quality/Reliability: Passat – 7/10 – Volkswagens have a reputation for electrical and mechanical issues which is perhaps why VW USA has priced most Passats with the durable-but-dull 170hp 2.5L I5 and the diesel to appeal to mainstream value-minded buyers while the more interesting (and problematic) V6 start at $30k. This new crop of less complicated, American-minded Volkswagens may finally improve VW’s reliability scores. Otherwise, build quality is quite good. Fusion – 7/10 – In the pre-Ecoboost era of Ford, the Duratec lineup of engines proved to be dependable and efficient, though not particularly noteworthy otherwise. 6F35 6-speed transmission issues on 2010-2012 Fusions take a reliability rating that would have been a 9 down to a 6.5. Find a 3.5L Fusion instead, mated to an Aisin automatic. Malibu – 8/10 – The Ecotec 2.4 is well-reputed and proven. Unfortunately, from 2004-2008 (possibly 2009) the HF 3.6L VVT V6 had issues with timing chains. A new part was issued in 2010 to remedy the problem under warranty. See details.Build quality is high with narrow and consistent panel gaps, perfectly fitted bumpers, consistently applied paint on metals and plastics, high-quality trim pieces, and doors that close with a reassuringly muted “thoomp.” The interior could use a couple refinements but the execution is elegant. I experienced one defect — the remote start did not work every time. All three cars are imperfect but well made.
Overall: Passat – 49/80 – If you insist on a European badge and don’t mind driving a bowl of thick syrup, this could be a worthy alternative to a Chevy Impala. Fusion – 63.5/80 – Polarizing front styling, polarizing interior, always fun to drive. Malibu – 64/80 – The car Goldilocks would choose. Reasonably talented, likely to be bargain-priced, and easy on the eyes.
Wildcards: 2011+ Kia Optima– Many prefer its driver-focused interior, high-tech features, sleek styling, powerful GDI turbo-4, big back seat, and bargain price. It is a very compelling choice among family sedans. Read the full review here.
2008+ and 2013 Honda Accord – The 2013 Accord offers a nice interior, an optional manual transmission, a silky V6, and the option of a two-door coupe. The 2008+ Accord, despite its dumpy styling, was competent if not eye-catching.
The midwest can be pretty harsh. Tornadoes obliterate entire communities, scorching summers destroy crops that feed the world, and if that’s not enough, the salt, muck, and grime of winter precipitation turns automobiles into piles of orange dust.
Growing up in Illinois in the 1980s, a new car was practically a necessity. Regardless of how well you maintained your vehicle with fresh fluids and parts, it was never enough to fight the effects of corrosion.
My mom recalled a story about our late-1970s Datsun B210 — Dad drove over a deep puddle which sent a geyser of filthy brown street water gushing into the passenger’s lap. The floors had almost entirely disappeared from rust.
My dad also owned a 1978 Honda Accord CVCC adorned in faded orange paint and gray primer. We got an earful as kids every time we jumped in. Dad was concerned that if we sat down too energetically, the seats might fall through the floor. In retrospect, his concerns were probably valid.
It quickly became commonplace knowledge that Japanese cars, at least before the use of electrogalvanized steel, had the body integrity of papier-måché. In my neck of the woods, Japan’s well-reputed fuel economy and dependability were meaningless if the vehicles themselves were physically junked after 3-5 years.
None of this, of course, applies to dry and sunny Southern California, an appropriate setting for the 2012 Japanese Classic Car Show, America’s best and largest display of fully functional, vintage Japanese cars. It was quite a treat as most of the vehicles on display had long ago disappeared from middle and northeastern American roads.
If a pristine Datsun 240Z is like a unicorn in its rarity, then JCCS is an entire stable of single-horned ponies.
The show takes place on the grounds of The Queen Mary, itself a piece of transportation history, now in use as a permanently docked hotel and museum. Predictably sunny skies promised a large turnout, but 100F temperatures and the lack of a coastal breeze discouraged me from hanging around for long. Fortunately, the show was small enough to take in every car in sufficient detail.
Noteworthy:
This 1982 family-owned Toyota pickup was converted into a camper with a fully carpeted bed, overhead skylight/vent, and insulated cabin pass-through:
The current owner bought it from his dad so it could be shared with the public.
Several Toyota 2000GTs were on display from Toyota as well as private owners. This is often referred to as Japan’s Jaguar E-type:
Greg and Becky from NICOClub brought a few members of their growing fleet of classic Datsuns. This is a 63,000 mile unrestored 1963 Datsun Bluebird:
This rare Honda CRX convertible was factory-sanctioned and warrantied, converted by an aftermarket coachbuilder:
I seriously considered taking this 1971 Honda N600 home for $4500, but it seems cruel to take a pristine piece of history and park it outside:
I need a garage.
The largest quantity of Datsuns roadsters I’ve ever seen in one place:
This is Mr K’s personal Datsun 240Z:
Yutaka Katayama is a former Nissan executive, now 103 years old, who played significant a role in the export of the legendary Datsun 510 and the design of the Datsun 240Z. In the late 1990s, “Mr K” was played by Dale Ishimoto in Nissan’s advertising, shown holding a Jack Russell terrier while declaring “Dogs love trucks!”
Katayama, considered the living embodiment of Nissan’s heritage, had a mantra: Love people. Love cars. Love life.
He continues to attend car shows and promote the Nissan brand. Below is an advertisement from 1996 emphasizing Nissan’s brand philosophy and colorful heritage:
“Any car can get you where you need to go. A special car gets you there with a smile on your face. Remember, young man: Life is a journey. Enjoy the ride.” Brilliant.
I didn’t stay for long due to the heat but I did have enough time to look at the most interesting cars in detail and relive lost pieces of my childhood. I fully intend to become a regular attendee.
GM’s best mainstream car in five decades ends production this year, making room for the much-maligned 8th-generation model for 2013. Nothing is fundamentally wrong with the new ‘Bu, but the five-inch shorter wheelbase, reduced rear leg room, loss of a V6 option, half-baked “eAssist” powertrain, and incongruous Camaro-inspired taillights have resulted in poor initial reviews and slow sales.
Treasury-appointed CEO Dan Akerson accelerated the release of the 2013 Malibu even though the mainstream 2.5L 4-cylinder powertrain wasn’t yet ready for market. As a result, the mild-hybrid ‘Eco’ model was rushed into production, utilizing a small battery that offers marginal gains in fuel economy at a cost that’s higher than it’s standard gasoline 4-cylinder competitors.
The 8th-gen sedan improves over its predecessor with reduced wind and tire noise, better fuel economy, improved chassis rigidity, reduced aerodynamic drag, and a noticeably upgraded interior.
Unfortunately, Chevrolet’s efforts may have been overshadowed by hungry and aggressive competitors from Asia. The Nissan Altima, Toyota Camry, Honda Accord, and Kia Optima have all grown in size while including additional luxury and standard technology, benchmarking each other while the Malibu lingers a quarter-step behind.
The new 4-cylinder Nissan Altima, for example, undercuts the mild-hybrid 2013 Malibu Eco by $4000 yet offers slightly better fuel economy, more trunk space (Malibu Eco’s battery consumes two cubic feet of cargo room), more interior space, and less weight.
So, while the new Malibu may be an improvement over its award-winning predecessor, the competition appears to have taken the segment a step further, enough to earn the new Malibu Eco the unfortunate title of “Most Disliked Car of 2012.”
Adding insult to injury, the outgoing 2012 model is available for $6000 less than the 2013 Malibu Eco thanks to generous factory and dealer incentives. Until inventories of 7th-gen models are depleted, sales of 2013 Malibus are expected to remain low.
The general consensus among the motoring press is that while the new Malibu is a thoroughly competent, nicely refined family car, its launch was botched by managerial impatience.
It is because of this debacle that we bid a sad farewell to the old Malibu.
I drove to Long Beach with my brother and a friend to attend the 2012 Japanese Classic Car Show. Unfortunately, we had diverging plans for the weekend so he took his Honda CRV to hang out in North Hollywood while I booked a rental and stayed in Orange County.
I booked a full size car on Priceline and headed to the airport. With my laptop in hand (no printer was available at the hotel) I approached the Hertz counter with my reservation number to pick up a full size car. Instead of a sprawling Grand Marquis, Avalon, or Taurus I was offered a Chevy Malibu, not exactly what comes to mind when I think of “full size.”
Curious about how the Malibu has endured after four years of production and eager to compare it to the 2008 Saturn Aura 3.6 I put 10,000 miles on four years ago, I caved in to Hertz’s stingy interpretation of “full size” and accepted the keys to my midsize-plus Chevrolet.
With a 169-horsepower 2.4-liter engine, 6-speed automatic transmission, leather-wrapped steering wheel, power heated driver’s seat, remote start, satellite radio, “ultralux” faux-suede/leatherette upholstery, 110-volt power outlet, Bluetooth, and 18” chrome wheels, a 2012 Malibu LT equipped this way would likely retail for just over $26,000 before rebates and incentives.
Except for a sunroof and a 252-hp V6, there isn’t much else to add, and for $32/day with unlimited mileage including tax I seemed to have done well.
In profile, the Malibu looks unusually expensive, adopting a formal C-pillar and rear glass design typically found on large Audis. The look of luxury is further enhanced by a straight, clean beltline that extends into a flat rear decklid. There’s a pleasing absence of the silly swoops and dips that were visible on the discontinued Pontiac G6, one of the Malibu’s Epsilon-platform siblings. The upscale rear-quarter appearance is spoiled only by bland and lifeless tail lights that appear to be an afterthought.
In front, the Malibu is slightly less distinctive with teardrop-shaped headlights that could have been plucked from any Japanese car. The protruding nose and chrome-accented fog light housings add a bit of class and distinction, however, and Chevrolet thankfully ditched the garish chrome bar that adorned the 6th-gen Malibu in favor of a painted segment between the upper and lower grille.
Inside, Chevy designers mended a flaw that was present on the Saturn Aura (also an Epsilon-based car) by properly matching the lines on the dashboard to the door panels. A tasteful strip of simulated wood sweeps across the doors, over the cowls, and down through the center stack, creating a sense of space and dimension.
The fake wood is complemented by silver plastic trim on the center stack and grained black surfaces on the doors and dashboard.
Chevrolet’s “ultralux” seating combines vinyl bolsters (they call it leatherette) with simulated suede inserts to create an expensive look at a low cost. The faux-suede inserts are also a clever workaround for problems typical with vinyl where hot seats can scorch the skin and cause excess perspiration.
Ian and I drove to LAX after dinner to pick up my friend Torry. Gliding around I-405’s sweeping on-ramps, the Malibu’s all-season Hankook Optimos felt firm and planted thanks to stiff sidewalls and tenacious grip. Body roll was plentiful but predictable, far from queasy and more than manageable, a welcome compromise in suspension tuning that allowed for an impressively smooth, sturdy, and upscale ride that mimicked a Mercedes E-class.
I got a chance to sample the Malibu’s pleasing interior lighting and aside from my blurry photography, all gauges and controls were clearly marked. As an added bonus, two lights in the overhead console gently illuminated the shifter and cupholder, making it easy to find coins or other objects without having to turn on the map lights.
Ambience lighting is typically found in luxury cars, especially BMWs. Not surprisingly, GM’s Vice Chair of Product Development, Bob Lutz, worked for BMW decades ago and likely borrowed the idea for the Malibu. Some suspect that the “LTZ” trim level applied to top-level Chevrolets was even named after Lutz himself.
[From Chad: “LTZ was first used by Chevrolet in 1992 for the “sporty” Caprice. The LTZ had the 350 as standard (back when the 305 was normally standard), a firmer suspension, blacked out grille, alloy wheels and the analog gauge cluster (with a digital speedo…go figure). When the Impala SS hit the market in ’94, the LTZ Caprice was history.”]
Even the perfect shape of the sporty steering wheel is borrowed from BMW’s E46 3-series.
After navigating the nightmare of congestion at LAX, we finally found Torry waiting in front of Delta arrivals and returned to the hotel in Long Beach. Ian dropped us off while Torry and I walked next door to check out the hotel bar.
Unfortunately, a mess of aged hippies in tie-dyed shirts were reliving Woodstock. We ditched that scene and walked next door to The Gaslamp where “Knyght Ryder” performed stellar tributes to Don Henley, Journey, Huey Lewis, Michael Jackson, Bill Idol, U2, Modern English, Kenny Loggins, and The Police.
Since Ian was sober (he always is), we walked back to the hotel, dragged him out of the room, and harassed him into driving us to some bars on Second Street.
Ian’s driving impressions were quite positive, noting the direct and perfectly weighted steering, supple suspension, and shockingly secure handling. I made sure to interrupt his talk radio station on XM by tuning to “20 on 20” and blasting Carly Rae Jepsen’s “Call Me Maybe,” because that’s what obnoxious drunks are supposed to do.
Around 2am, after we failed to get into any bars (or get any phone numbers) as last call neared, we had Ian take us back to the hotel. My vision by that point was as clear and crisp as the picture above.
The following morning, I woke up and drove Torry to the Japanese Classic Car Show where he was helping out with the NICO Club booth. I wiped the sleep from my eyes, threw on a t-shirt, and headed down the stairs.
A narrow tray in the back of the upper storage compartment was designed to hold pens and pencils but it happened to be perfect for propping up my phone and shading the display from sunlight. The bottom is rubberized to prevent rattling and also kept my phone from sliding back and forth.
I plugged it into the USB port on the dash and set my GPS app for the Queen Mary where JCCS was setting up.
There’s the Queen Mary, currently a hotel and museum.
Only in California can so many classic cars be found in like-new condition, driven routinely in regular traffic. We spotted this Beetle near downtown Long Beach. Note how close the driver and passenger are.
Southern California’s coast is an abrupt mix of industry and natural beauty, where oil platforms and beaches occupy the same line of sight.
General Motors once owned Frigidaire and like most GM vehicles, the Malibu’s easy-to-use air conditioning was cold enough to turn the cabin into a rolling meat locker.
The factory sound system exceeded expectations with deep bass and strong highs. Mids were a little muddy but part of the blame can be placed on XM satellite radio’s heavily compressed audio. Compared to the 2008 Saturn Aura, the Malibu offers noticeably improved clarity and a much wider soundstage.
In addition to selectable presets, the digital EQ allows for separate adjustment of bass, treble, and mid range.
With my eyes on the road, I occasionally pressed the Menu button instead of the first radio preset button by mistake, otherwise the CD, AM, FM, USB, Bluetooth, and XM functions were straightforward and logical. A large, central volume knob (with additional steering-mounted controls) is a welcome feature, especially as manufacturers foolishly attempt to replace reliable rotary controls with finicky capacitive-touch buttons and sliders.
Like the Pontiac G6 and Saturn Aura, the Malibu places its gauges inside motorcycle-style pods. While this was interesting to look at a decade ago, it hasn’t worn well with time. Otherwise, the needles and numbers are large, well-lit, and easy to read. The pixelated information display can be changed with steering wheel-mounted buttons to show fuel economy, oil life, outdoor temperature, trip data, and tire pressure.
After dropping Torry off, I returned to the hotel and enjoyed two additional hours of sleep. I woke up again, showered, and drove back to JCCS in the afternoon with Ian.
(Car show pictures here.)
Porsche sighting!
After the show, Ian, my brother, I threw our beach gear in the Malibu and headed down the Pacific Coast Highway. In Texas and Florida, the beaches are free or near-free with little or no congestion. In California, beach entrances were packed with queues that were at least 20 cars deep.
We were forced to drive an additional 20 minutes south to Huntington Beach where we paid $15 to park the Malibu.
There was a staggering number of people enjoying the sand and surf on a Sunday afternoon. The problem with the “California Dream” is that everyone wants it and, subsequently, California is now full.
Unlike the warm, soothing water I enjoyed in The Gulf of Mexico a couple weeks earlier during a trip to Texas, the Pacific Ocean in Southern California was brutally cold with powerful waves that repeatedly slapped me in the face with frigid salt water. It was far less pleasant for swimming though perhaps ideal for surfing. It certainly wasn’t my cup of tea.
After an hour or so of dabbling around, the three of us took the Malibu back to the hotel to meet up with the NICO Club crew for dinner.
The food at The Gaslamp was thoroughly mediocre, salvaged only by strong drinks and prompt service.
My overcooked salmon was thankfully complemented by perfectly cooked bok choy and fragrant white rice.
Eager to forget about our below-average meal, I sent a text message to my friend Dustin, a Subaru WRX-driving chef who I met during a Northern California road trip last year. After doing a one-year stint cooking in The Hamptons, he recently returned to California to run the kitchen at Houston’s, an upscale-casual dining establishment.
The Malibu wasn’t due back at Hertz for several hours so we left my brother’s Honda at the hotel, threw my luggage into the Malibu’s spacious 15.1 cubic foot trunk, and headed south to Irvine for a late lunch.
The Malibu’s cargo space is further enhanced by the use of outside-mounted gas-charged struts instead of large metal articulating arms, a clever touch typically reserved for more expensive cars.
This makes it possible to use the full capacity of the trunk without worrying about whether the trunk lid has room to close. Neither the Toyota Camry or Honda Accord offered this clever feature.
Walking into Houston’s, the atmosphere reminded me of J Alexander’s or Red Rock Canyon Grill, casual but pleasingly upscale with a focus on quality ingredients and a wide selection of wines. The food at Houston’s, however, was significantly higher in quality.
I ordered a California Roll as an appetizer. Normally, I shy away from sushi — the ingredients have to be exceptionally fresh and perfectly balanced, otherwise it tends to be bland and lifeless.
Pleasingly, what came to our table was moist, delicate, eye-catching, and fragrant.
I sent Dustin a text message to let him know we arrived and he walked over to the dining room to greet us.
Professional chefs lead interesting lives. After working in the San Francisco area, Dustin was transferred to The Hamptons where he spent a year cooking for the well-heeled in one of America’s wealthiest communities. His housing and food costs were paid for while he worked long but satisfying hours.
I asked him about the roast chicken but he suggested trying the ribs and steaks. You don’t travel 1,800 miles across the country to eat a salad, so my brother and I each ordered a rare Hawaiian ribeye and Ian ordered a medium-rare filet.
What arrived was a stunning piece of perfectly cooked, sweetly marinated beef with a side of sauteed Peruvian corn. The corn was seasoned with curry, tumeric, and other spices that elevated a typically plain and lifeless vegetable to something lively and vivid.
The Hawaiian ribeye, I learned, is one of Houston’s most-favored dishes. Several have attempted to duplicate the sweet marinade including this food blogger. Of course, recreating the recipe at home doesn’t come with the excellent service, pleasing atmosphere, and attention to detail of a professional cook.
Despite being stuffed to the brim, I went ahead and ordered a dessert. Dustin came to check on us and suggested the sundae.
That’s enough sugar to feed a village… for a month! The gravy boat on the right contains real hot fudge which I poured directly on to the Double Rainbow vanilla ice cream, which happens to be my favorite brand. I was deeply disappointed when my local Trader Joe’s in St Louis stopped carrying it years ago.
I can say with confidence that this was the best steak I’ve had since dining at Bern’s Steakhouse in Tampa, Florida.
Additionally, we owe a huge thanks to Dustin Pankow for an outstanding lunch.
It was getting close to 2pm and although the Malibu wasn’t due back until 7 that evening, we wanted to head to Simi Valley in time for the Reagan Museum which closed at 5. We headed back to Long Beach to top off the car and pick up my brother’s Honda which was still parked at the hotel.
Nice Thunderbird!
A full tank cost a little over $62 at $4.25 per gallon. Back in Missouri, gas was “only” $3.70 for regular unleaded.
With mostly assertive city driving, the 20.4 MPG average was quite commendable, especially because I neglected to reset the counter at the beginning of our weekend. The EPA gives the 4-cylinder 6-speed Malibu a rating of 22 city, 33 highway.
Before handing the keys back to Hertz, I took a few additional photos of the interior to highlight a couple of the Malibu’s minor flaws.
Though back seat leg room is quite generous, the openings for the rear doors are too low. As a result, tall people are likely to bump their heads when getting in and out.
Rear air vents mounted on the back of the center console would have been nice to have in such a long cabin, although the 115-volt power outlet is a nice touch. With the Malibu’s popularity among government, service, and sales fleets, the power connector is wonderfully handy for laptop and cell phone chargers.
Additionally, the materials on the dash and door panel have differing textures. The upper door is adorned in a softer material while the lower doors feel a bit cheap and hard. In pictures they look the same but after a few hours of driving these imperfections become more apparent.
Perhaps the worst offender is the map pocket on each door. You can see and feel the sharp plastic casting flash leftover from the plastic mould. Additionally, the hard plastic on the arm rest is prone to scratches. This kind of cost-cutting slightly spoils an otherwise ideal family vehicle.
Rarely do I develop a fondness for the cars that I rent — two noteworthy examples include a solidly built 2007 Cadillac DTS I drove to Tennessee and a sprightly 2007 Mazda 6 sedan I rented in Tampa. Rental fleets tend to offer cars that we auto enthusiasts would never buy, rolling appliances that drive like cold porridge, but the Malibu is a refreshing exception.
I will miss its quiet comfort, secure handling, smooth ride, generous offering of standard features, and understated elegance. This was quite an achievement for Chevrolet.
Grudgingly, I gave the keys back to Hertz.
RATINGS:
Powertrain: 8.5/10 — The 6T40 6-speed automatic transmission makes the best of GM’s 169-hp 2.4L Ecotec engine. Unlike its sibling, the Saturn Aura, the Malibu is often in the right gear, rarely hunting or searching. Shifts are pleasingly smooth but perceptible enough to offer a bit of feedback.
The 2.4L Ecotec isn’t particularly pleasing to the ear, especially compared to GM’s racy 3.6L VVT V6, but the firewall is so well-insulated that the 4-banger’s angry cries are muted.
Full application of the accelerator is unnecessary for swift take-offs thanks to excellent gearing. I only found myself flooring the throttle when passing on the highway or maneuvering into gaps in traffic. The only disappointment is in weak mid-throttle acceleration, like when approaching a traffic circle at 25mph then flooring it to speed up to 40.
With the 6-speed, the Ecotec 2.4 is perfectly usable and frequently satisfying, but the V6 would add some missing entertainment.
Braking: 9/10 — The Malibu’s pedal modulation is firm and progressive, almost BMW-like in its immediate response and short stopping distances. It’s quite a contrast from the Toyota Camry which suffers from a bit of mushiness.
Ride: 9/10 — The body structure is rock solid, gliding over bumps and imperfections in a quietly sturdy way that draws comparisons to midsize German luxury cars. Malibu’s ride and handling compromise is ideal.
Steering/Handling: 9/10 – Body motions are well-controlled while zipping left and right through traffic. Body roll around sweeping curves is noticeable but entirely manageable, never bouncing, floating, or exhibiting any loss of control. Credit goes to all-season Hankook Optimos for exceptional grip, stiff sidewalls, and a luxurious ride on California’s badly neglected freeways.
Steering is lively and direct with a sporty BMW-like 3-spoke wheel that’s nice to hold in the hand. Steering effort builds up nicely while cornering.
A little bit of additional road surface feedback would be nice, but the Malibu is better than the norm for this segment. Mazda still sets the standard for steering.
Audio/Accessories: 9/10 — The standard GM sound system is surprisingly powerful and bright. Logical controls and a clear radio display make XM, bluetooth, and USB functions a breeze.
Climate controls are a standard three-knob setup with two buttons for recirculation settings.
Every button, knob, and switch feels fluid and luxurious, adorned in tasteful bits of plastichrome.
Audio, phone, and information buttons on the steering wheel are a bit too small to see and press easily. Bonus: A 115-volt outlet mounted on the back of the front arm rest makes laptop charging easy.
Interior: 7.5/10 — The dual-cowl setup creates a sense of space while sweeping segments of faux wood from ear to ear break up the monotony of grained black surfaces. Chevy took too many shortcuts in the materials chose for the lower door panels, unfortunately.
The back seat can feel dark and isolating, a problem exacerbated by high door sills and an encroaching roof that makes ingress and egress a challenge for tall people. Fortunately, once seated, rear passengers enjoy outstanding leg room. The lack of a rear arm rest is a bit unusual.
It can also be a bit difficult to see stop lights if you’re sitting at the front of an intersection due to the windshield’s low sight lines.
Overall, the inside of a Malibu is a nice place to be.
Comfort: 9/10 – Front seats are well-bolstered with excellent thigh support. Adjustable lumbar on lower trim levels would be nice, but the default configuration is perfect for long-distance trips or hours spent idling in California traffic. The driver gets a power seat adjuster with manual rake. We never sampled the heated seats because it was 100 degrees outside.
Quality/Reliability: 8/10 — The Ecotec 2.4 is well-reputed and proven. Unfortunately, from 2004-2008 (possibly 2009) the HF 3.6L VVT V6 had issues with timing chains. A new part was issued to remedy the problem. See details.
Exterior build quality is exceptionally high with narrow and consistent panel gaps, perfectly fitted bumpers, consistently applied paint on metals and plastics, high-quality trim pieces, and doors that close with a reassuringly muted “thoomp.”
The interior, as mentioned above, could use a couple refinements but the execution is classy and elegant.
I experienced one defect — the remote start did not work every time.
Overall Value: 9/10 — Compared to the Camry and Accord, the 2008-2012 Malibu is a very strong contender. It’s biggest competition is from the more powerful and head-turning 2011+ Kia Optima Turbo.
VERDICT: This isn’t just a great Chevrolet. It’s a great car, period. If you’re in the market for a new family sedan, take advantage of GM’s incentives and buy one now.
This morning I took my Dodge Ram to Reuther Automotive in Creve Coeur, Missouri, a family-owned ex-Chrysler dealer that now specializes in used cars and service. As I pulled into the service bay for my oil change this well-aged Wagoneer caught my eye.
The sales staff were still in bed by the time I arrived at 7am so I didn’t get a chance to drive it, but it was unlocked so I snooped around.
Created by Willys (Kaiser-Jeep) in 1963 and developed further by AMC and Chrysler, the Wagoneer is considered the first real luxury SUV, predating the Range Rover by two decades. Powertrains include AMC V8s and I6s, Jeep I6s, Buick V8s, and a mix of Borg-Warner, GM, and Chrysler automatics as well as a 4-speed manual.
For the 1960s, they were feature-rich with push-button preset AM/FM radios, courtesy lights, air conditioning, power brakes, four doors, automatic transmissions, full carpeting, two rows of bench seats with belts, and tilt steering.
Surprisingly, other than the lack of carpeting in front (rubber floors mats cover the area), the interior was perfectly in tact. The factory AM/FM radio, drawers, center glove box, and push-button climate control functions all seemed to work. Under the cloth covers, the vinyl seats were still in excellent condition.
The paint was, of course, well past expiration. Though there’s a pleasing lack of rust or Bondo, it appears that several panels were painted by hand though from 20 feet away it looks decent for its age. While classic cars tend to look best in lustrous layers of fresh clearcoat, classic trucks take pride in their natural age.
The rear hatch, interestingly, opens downward like a pickup truck tailgate, fitting since the Wagoneer is built on the Jeep Gladiator full-size pickup platform. The handle in the center of the gate is used to roll down the rear glass. Then, inside, you can grab the handle and pop it open. There’s a key lock on the outside handle hidden under the round Jeep logo.
Willys changed its name to Kaiser-Jeep in 1963 and remained that way until it was acquired by AMC in 1970. Chrysler, flush with cash from minivan and K-car profits, then acquired AMC in 1987. Production of the Wagoneer continued until June 1991, still powered by AMC’s carbureted V8.
Based on the condition, 45,000 miles sounds believable.
Owner documentation and service records in the glove box further confirm the odometer reading.
Underneath, there’s an expected level of corrosion for a vehicle that’s seen more than four decades of service. No significant leaks are present though there’s a minor axle seal drip on the passenger side.
I’ve been shopping for a vintage Honda motorcycle (1980s) but the prospect of owning this genuine piece of American history is quite appealing.
If you’re wondering, fuel economy is 11 mpg at best and 0-60 acceleration times are anywhere from 15-18 seconds. That’s 0-60, not the quarter mile.
I could throw on a fresh coat of paint and flip it for a profit, but I have a feeling I’d end up keeping it, loving it, and needlessly pouring thousands into restoration. That’s my dilemma.
Back in 2005, my youngest brother turned three and I was about to get him a $10 pack of toy cars. I was at Wal-Mart with a friend and saw an Escalade, Hummer, Jeep, and this Mustang.
I said “Should I do it? Should I really do it? I always wanted one when I was a kid.”
Business was good that month so I figured why the heck not? After a minute or so of contemplation, I got a shopping cart and loaded it up. Just under $300 disappeared from my checking account.
The massively successful 2005 Mustang (the adult version made of steel), a retro-modern design by engineer Hau Thai-Tang and designer Sid Ramnarace, recalls the look and feel of the first-generation coupe without indulging in cartoonish parodies like the Volkswagen Beetle and Chrysler PT Cruiser.
These plastic Fisher Price cars do actually mimic the structural layout of modern unibody cars. The passenger compartment and rear which carry the bulk of the weight are a single structural piece for rigidity. It comes equipped with two electric motors (capable of 5 mph) and a 12-volt lead-acid battery.
The nose, which houses the battery, attaches separately.
Even the steering system uses a non-powered rack and pinion configuration that one might find in small sports cars.
Without the advantage of robot assembly, it took us about an hour to put it together. The instructions were pleasingly simple and all the parts were easy to snap or screw together.
Inevitably and perhaps unfortunately, children grow out of their toys as they age and like real automobiles, electric toys can be passed down from generation to generation. My brother and sister have moved on to iPads and Kindles while the Mustang collected dust in the garage — lots of it.
Before dealing with the dead battery or any other electrical issues, I had quite a bit of body and interior work ahead of me. The exterior, pictured below, was filthy, caked with dust and chock full of spider eggs, webs, and other creepy-crawly things that take residence in dark crevices.
I took a wet rag and wiped down the exterior, bringing back some of the shine.
The interior is surprisingly well-appointed with a battery charge indicator, lighted gauges, a radio, a cupholder, a two-speed gearbox with reverse, and a key.
The key doesn’t do any actual locking or unlocking, but if you push the key in, the internal speakers play a startup and revving sound.
Red lights on the gauge cluster sweep across in sequence to suggest needle movement. It’s completely disconnected from reality, but for a toddler its as good as it gets.
This lockout screw can be used to keep second ‘gear’ from engaging, limiting the car to 2.5 mph, half its top speed.
It even comes equipped with safety equipment — lap belts for the driver and passenger.
The front seats can be moved backward and forward by undoing two screws, lifting the seats, and reinstalling them.
I had quite a job ahead of me, using everything from wash rags to the shop vac.
I tackled the easiest part of the job first, removing the seats for washing.
Years of dirt washed down the drain as the seats were pummeled with high pressure shower water.
Underneath was a mess of insects, spiders, spider eggs, and dirt, so out came the big guns:
You can see the two small electric motors below. Like the real thing, this is rear-wheel drive. Though the tires are plastic, the child’s weight over the rear axle improves traction.
The motors also have built-in overheating protection, easily upgradable to something more robust.
You can see the steering rack here as well as the “engine cradle” that holds the front wheel assembly and battery compartment.
Next, I pulled out the windshield and dashboard to see if any bugs were crawling underneath.
The electrical system is pretty simple. Pictured on the right is the radio, held in by two screws with one speaker on the back. The lights and sounds require separate AA batteries.
In the middle is the battery level indicator and on the left are the lighted gauges. The black wire harness connects the radio and gauges together so that pressing the key plays engine sounds through the radio speaker.
Nothing to see below. Just taking a peek inside the battery level indicator.
The green level on the far right corresponds to 12-14 volts.
Here’s how it looks with the dashboard and steering wheel removed.
Not wanting to spend $70 on a new battery, I decided to see if I could revive the old one. After years of sitting dormant, it showed a paltry .04 volts.
Every morning I pulled it off the charger to check the voltage. Finally, after about two weeks, it read 14 volts.
I installed the newly revived battery, hit the throttle, and it zipped forward. Mission accomplished! It will, however, need to be fully discharged and recharged a few times to properly condition the battery.
We loaded it up in the back of my truck along with some other gifts and gave it to Luke, my friend’s toddler-aged son. I also pulled the batteries from the radio — that could drive a parent insane pretty quickly.
Last year I took a 2000 Honda Insight for a drive. Unlike the homely Toyota Prius, the first-generation Insight is light on its feet, fun to drive, simple to service, and goes about its fuel-sipping business without excess political baggage.
Salivating over the thought of 70mpg road trips, I began a nationwide search for my own. Unfortunately, the 2000 Insight that my friends Greg and Becky were selling had already found a new owner by the time I was ready to buy. Undeterred, I scoured the nation for decent used examples. The problem with the Insight is that it comes in two forms: heavily abused and ragged out for cheap or modestly maintained and unreasonably expensive. Discouragingly for buyers, resale value has only increased as high gas prices and global economic hardships continue.
I finally found a decent one in Indiana that needed a new IMA (Integrated Motor Assist) battery, asking just two grand with a quarter million miles on the clock, rust-free (Insights are made of aluminum) and equipped with a manual transmission. In the past, IMA replacement batteries cost thousands at the dealer, but now they can be serviced by aftermarket rebuilders for as little as $1000. As an added bonus, the IMA circuit board can be bypassed to enable driving on the gas engine alone, a clever workaround unique to first-generation Insights.
Unfortunately, this one had also found a new owner by the time I was ready to book my train ticket.
So, I was back to my old standards, looking for a comfortable but fairly efficient (25 mpg or better) luxury cruiser to replace the Cadillac Seville I sold earlier this year. I found myself perusing Autotrader for Lincoln LS8s, Saab 9-3s, Saab 9-5s, Jaguar X-types, Lincoln Town Cars, Lincoln Continentals, and Jaguar S-types.
Then suddenly, with my automotive ADD in full swing, I hopped on a plane and flew to San Antonio to buy my friend’s 2002 Dodge Ram.
The story of this truck goes back to 2009; my friend Ian, who at the time lived in Tampa, bought it with just 75,000 miles. The price, at the time below book value at $5800, reflected the spartan list of equipment. All the doors, windows, seats, and mirrors are manually operated and there is no traction control, stability control, front ABS, or four-wheel drive.
The only options were a 4-speed automatic, chrome bumpers, 17” chrome wheels, a CD player, and a tow package which comes with upgraded engine and transmission cooling, trailer wiring, an upgraded battery, and a hitch. With a split cloth bench seat and two doors, this no-frills work truck was far-removed from the leather-lined quad-cab family movers that occupy affluent suburban driveways.
Even with its entry-level 215hp V6, this was still a proper blue-collar pickup truck with rubber floors you could wash and durable plastic door panels that didn’t care how filthy your hands got from working — quite a contrast to my automatic Saab convertible and a refreshing change of pace.
And although I’ve never owned a pickup, I’ve driven a few.
Earlier this year I spent a month with a 1978 Toyota SR5, a delightfully base and crude piece of machinery that was unexpectedly entertaining to putter around in. For every glaring flaw in its ride, handling, and comfort it gained a point in total driving enjoyment, a blissful indulgence in immaturity.
Years ago I put a few thousand miles on a brand new 2009 Nissan Frontier, using it to move furniture, car parts, and other odds and ends between Missouri and Ohio. The Frontier was so smooth, refined, and quiet that it was a bore to live with day to day. I returned the Nissan to Enterprise and despite its capability, comfort, smart packaging, and reliability, I had no fondness for it whatsoever.
I also spent a weekend with a 2007 Ford F-150 from U-Haul and aside from the wind-tunnel blower motor (a great feature when moving furniture on a hot July day), I didn’t recall much of the driving experience.
I did, however, genuinely enjoy driving a friend’s 1990 Chevy Silverado, equipped with a torquey 350 V8, front bench seat, and automatic transmission. It cruised like an old Cadillac Brougham, looked as tough as an ox and felt… as the Chevy ads said… like a rock.
This 2002 Dodge Ram, on the other hand, is a Goldilocks in-betweener. It drives like a much smaller pickup with its quick steering, secure handling, and surprisingly strong brakes but at highway speeds its quiet cabin and smooth ride draw comparisons to the Lincoln Town Car. It certainly helps that it’s been cared for and driven gently.
Unfortunately, this truck’s easy life as a Texas woman’s sunny-day commuter vehicle came to an abrupt end in 2010. Mopars are notoriously easy to steal and Texas, because of its border with Mexico, is a hotbed of crime for drug runners and illegal immigrants. One afternoon, while the Ram was parked and locked at the mall in San Antonio, someone broke in, shoved a screwdriver in the ignition, and swiftly took off.
Days later, it was located in a town 45 minutes away after being found in a field. Police believed it was used to transport drugs and rammed through a fence while evading law enforcement. I guess I can’t blame them. It is, after all, called a Ram for a reason.
The fence left deep gouges all over the body, right down to the metal where rust was beginning to form. The wiper arms were bent, the mirror was destroyed, and the windshield endured some large dings and cracks.
The grille, though damaged, stayed attached and the rest of the front end was mostly in tact.
My friend’s brother went down to Texas to acquire it from the lot where it was impounded and drove it to my preferred body shop here in Missouri. There was nothing at all wrong with the driveline or suspension — no shakes, no shudders, no mechanical damage at all despite being used as a heroin dealer’s off-road getaway vehicle.
Thankfully, after several hours of hard work my body guy, Sean, had it looking like new.
The bed and tailgate have a few scratches that I chose to leave alone but otherwise, the Ram looks like it just rolled off the assembly line.
And really, after polishing the headlights, replacing the cracked grille and mirror, and installing a plastic cover to hide the cracked dash (a common problem on 02-08 Rams), it looked better than before. The Ram was returned to San Antonio where my friend’s mom continued to put another 20,000 trouble-free miles on it.
Now, fast forward to 2012…
My friend’s mom remarried a year ago and left her job so the Ram went from being her daily driver to an extraneous vehicle. The ridiculously overpriced used car market wasn’t calling out to me with anything particularly enticing and I sort of needed a truck anyway for my business.
So, after a bit of discussion, my friend Ian convinced me to acquire it from his mother. We booked a couple flights and flew down to Texas to drive it up to St Louis.
At $3200, even with 105,000 miles, I was a few hundred dollars ahead of private party book value. Not bad considering it was driven gently (except during the theft) and had a few recent services performed including fresh transmission fluid and an AC condenser fan.
Naturally, upon arriving in San Antonio, the first thing we did was eat.
Bill Miller’s Bar-B-Q has the best fried chicken and sausage I’ve ever had anywhere, ever. The price was right, about ten bucks with a drink, the locations we tried were all very clean, and the service was excellent. If I wasn’t buying a car, I’d have flown here for the food alone. Because we were already here, Ian figured we’d make a small vacation of it and drive down to Corpus Christi to eat some seafood and hang out on the beach.
The following day we loaded up our suitcases; there’s just enough room behind the front seats to accommodate two of them in addition to small bags and tools.
This odd-looking hook is apparently a place to store coins. I had to Google it to figure out what it was for.
Note how clean and uniform the top of the dashboard looks. On eBay you can buy a $200 plastic cover that hides the massive dashboard cracks that often form on these 02-08 Rams. It fits perfectly and unless you look very closely at the seam where the cover meets the top of the vents, you’d never notice it.
This is how the dashboard looked before:
In some cases, the plastic can break into tiny little pieces and fall into the vents. Then, when the defroster is turned on, the plastic bits fly into the cabin like a flurry of black snow. Fortunately, this only had a couple large cracks along the top, easily covered, and once protected from the sun the cracking ceased.
Anyway, back to the trip…
Behind the wheel, I immediately noticed how “alive” the steering felt, quick to respond to inputs and reasonably communicative for a half-ton pickup. On the highway it inspired confidence and helped the Ram feel smaller and more maneuverable in parking lots.
One problem with driving a pickup that has an open bed is that you have to secure your cargo. Ian looked in the rear view mirror and saw a blue plastic bin fluttering around, on the verge of flying out of the bed and landing in someone’s windshield. We pulled off in a small town and, unable to find an unlocked dumpster, we settled on a garbage can at a car wash:
Perhaps we should have placed the white trash can inside of the blue bin. Either way, the deed was done and the problem was resolved.
This is the USS Lexington in Corpus Christi, and nearby is an aquarium and art gallery.
As common as Toyota Camrys are in typical American driveways, half-ton pickups are everywhere in Texas, as if $3.50 per gallon fuel prices never happened. Economically, Texas feels like it’s still in the 1990s, enjoying relatively low unemployment, a low cost of living, and lots of opportunity.
Beach towns, whether its Florida, Oregon, or Texas, seem to share the same quaint look, chock full of souvenir shops, fake downtown/Main Street areas, and gimmicky tourist traps.
The room at the America’s Best Value Inn offers a view of the water in Rockport…
…and the sheets are superbly comfortable.
Unfortunately, later that evening I saw a small roach crawling across the bathroom counter.
And this card was placed in the bathroom as a tacky “DONT STEAL THINGS!” warning, as if I was in a hotel room commonly occupied by vagrants, addicts, and thieves.
Making matters worse, the cable and internet both went out.
I give this place a 3/10 — 3 points for the comfortable sheets and comforters, 0 for everything else. Rockport is too far away from the restaurants and attractions in Corpus Christi and the beach up here is nothing special.
This is a Lincoln Mark LT in the flesh, essentially a gussied up F-series pickup. Lincoln only sold them here from 2005-2008, but they continue to be offered in Mexico. Compared to the Escalade EXT, the Lincoln was a standard pickup truck that lacked the EXT’s refinement and clever midgate for extended cargo space. Sales were slow even with massive $10,000 discounts.
Starving, we headed to Corpus Christi to find something to eat and came across a clean Acura NSX.
The bridge near downtown Corpus Christi was decoratively lit at night.
It’s a nice, cost-effective way to highlight a tourist area.
We had a seat at Pier 99 next to the USS Lexington and enjoyed a few drinks and fried seafood.
I had a beautiful view of downtown Corpus Christi from the pier.
We headed back to Rockport and crashed for the night.
The following morning I saw my dream car sitting at a stoplight, the Cadillac XLR-V.
We headed to Bill Miller’s again, this time for fried chicken. I swear on my life that it’s the best fried chicken I’ve ever had. EVER. It was moist through and through with a perfectly crisp, almost buttery skin.
We then headed east toward Padre Island.
I had to capture a picture of this clean Datsun pickup. Unfortunately, my camera lens accumulated quite a bit of dirt on the inside, requiring warranty service.
There it is, the Gulf of Mexico.
We drove the Ram down the beach and found a place to park.
Because of the Hurricane Isaac, the waves were delightfully strong. The water was exceptionally warm though unusually salty.
After an hour or so of hanging out in the water the sun began to set and the air became cool.
We drove north to Port Aransas and took the free ferry that connects the island to the mainland.
This ferry service runs 24 hours a day with no tolls or fees whatsoever. In the winter, when people come south to escape the snow, there is often a line to cross. Eight boats carry traffic back and forth, two of which can hold as many as 28 vehicles.
The Ram’s cleanly arranged white-faced gauges are pleasant during the day but at night the numbers are unevenly lit. It’s not a big deal, but its an annoyance and a reminder of some of Chrysler’s design oversights.
With all the decent restaurants closed by 9 or 10pm, we settled for Whataburger.
We checked out of the room the following day after being rudely awoken by the front desk and housekeeping staff. We headed north toward San Antonio and planned on getting to Dallas by midnight.
EVERYTHING is bigger in Texas. This gas station has dozens of pumps!
This ridiculous sign in front of Best Buy says “Reserved for Fuel Efficient Vehicle Parking Only”
Well, efficiency is relative. Since this is a V6 Ram and most of the trucks in Texas are powered by a V8, you could call this a fuel efficient vehicle, yes? It certainly seems more efficient to achieve 20 mpg while pulling cargo than it is to achieve 40 mpg with no hauling or towing capacity.
It’s nothing but absurd do-gooder bullshit.
With 900 miles ahead of us, we needed to do something about our music problem. The truck only came with a single-disc CD player that offered no auxiliary or cassette input, so something had to be done to rectify the situation.
I went on to Craigslist and found a CD-cassette head unit being sold by someone in Austin, just an hour north of San Antonio, so we coordinated with the seller and headed north.
He turned out to be a police officer on duty, a rather polite one. After circling the station several times trying to find him, we shook hands and exchanged $30.
On eBay, this same stereo is $80-$120.
It was also made in Japan, likely by Alpine.
Ian’s stepdad left a tool box behind the seat which allowed us to perform the installation in the parking lot of a Chinese restaurant.
While we were taunted by the sweet smells of broccoli beef and crab rangoon, the whole job took just 10 minutes. The panel under the steering wheel pops off and that reveals two screws, one on each side of the large center panel. The whole thing then flips forward and the radio is held in by four screws.
The last owner left a Led Zeppelin album in the tape deck.
And there it is, properly installed. In addition to sounding MUCH better, the display uses nice-looking pixels instead of seven-segment LEDs to show RDS data.
I started tracking our fuel economy, so far 18.7 mpg. That’s decent fuel economy especially considering the time spent mucking around in congested Austin and San Antonio traffic.
Approaching Dallas. This is commonly referred to as the “disco ball.”
Built in 1978 and known properly as Reunion Tower, this is part of the Hyatt Regency complex. At the top are three floors connected to the ground by three elevator shafts. Inside is an observation deck and restaurant.
You can see it sweeping across the screen in the intro to “Dallas”
Around 11pm we arrived at our hotel in north Dallas, located next to the galleria.
“Le Meridien” is a four-star property booked through Priceline for $50 plus $18 for on-site parking.
Nice lobby.
Police tape. Not sure what to make of it.
The room was stunning, spacious with modern and artful carpeting, wallpaper, and furniture.
Room service, unfortunately, closed at 11pm so I wandered into the streets in search of Whataburger. There were a couple sketchy blocks but nothing too worrisome. I and others had trouble with our parking cards, having to call security to get them to manually open the gate so we could leave. I seriously considered driving over a curb.
The architecture here is very 1970s/1980s.
After a very comfortable stay and a quick stop at an Irish pub to see an old friend, we hit the road, traveling primarily along four-lane divided state roads, bypassing Oklahoma City and Tulsa and going directly to Joplin, Missouri.
But before leaving Dallas, we made a stop at In and Out. I was surprised by the negative reviews I&O received online from locals.
That didn’t stop the place from being packed late in the afternoon. The fries were particularly terrible but everything else was good, though not quite as good as it is in California.
Heading towards Choctaw Nation we came across this old rail bridge, looking like it was ready to collapse into the water.
An old Corolla adorned with racing stripes and rally lights.
We pulled into an Indian casino. I’ve passed this place before but never stopped and looked around. So, I went inside intending to foolishly throw my money away.
I put $20 into a slot machine and walked out with $53.75. Not bad for five minutes of pushing buttons. I quickly cashed out and left.
Fuel economy continued to creep up with each tank, now at 18.9 mpg. Not bad at all considering the constant stop and go every time the state highway wandered through a town.
Freight trains, a symbol of western American remoteness.
The last time I drove through this section of US-69 was at night. I never realized it was so scenic, flanked on each side by Eufaula Lake and Lake Eufaula State Park.
From here, the trip was interrupted by torrential rain. A lack of TCS and ESP compelled me to slow down and take it easy. As a result, fuel economy increased again, this time to 19.2 mpg.
Except for the sometimes annoying lack of cruise control, the truck was flawless. The Ram offered a level of long-distance comfort and refinement nearly on par with some luxury sedans.
Flying to Texas, pigging out on barbecue, and buying a half-ton pickup was quite a diversion from my original plan. I’m looking forward to customizing it with keyless entry, remote start, and some chrome bits here and there.
RATINGS:
Powertrain: 7.5/10 — Surprisingly, the 3.7L Magnum V6, with only 210 horsepower and 230 lb-ft of torque, moved the Ram off the line with authority and even provided sufficient, if not spectacular passing power well up to 90 mph. Much of this can be attributed to the 4-speed 45RFE transmission which features two second-gear ratios, one for upshifts and one for kick-down acceleration. Chrysler calls it a “multispeed” gearbox. With the automatic, this combination gives a 2-3 mpg advantage over the 4.9, 5.7, and 5.9 liter V8s. Shifts are smooth and swift with the transmission never drawing attention to itself.
Despite a somewhat loud exhaust, the engine is usually silent in operation, so you’re rarely reminded that you’re two cylinders short of a “real” truck.
I came close to EPA fuel economy ratings of 16/20, achieving 16 mpg in town and 19.2 mpg on the highway, helped in part by the lack of four-wheel drive hardware or almost any other power equipment.
Braking: 9/10 — The Ram has best-in-class braking thanks to 13” discs front and rear and near-perfect modulation that feels almost as natural and responsive as a Range Rover.
Ride: 8/10 — Because this is a V6 work truck with few options, curb weight was kept to a minimum at just under 4900 lbs. Except for a few minor shakes and quivers expected for a shortbed pickup, the Ram is unexpectedly stiff, smooth, and quiet with its independent front suspension gliding over moderate roadway imperfections. The short wheelbase is less steady over undulating surfaces, but overall it rides well.
Steering/Handling: 8/10 – A stiff hydroformed frame and quick, fairly communicative steering result in unusually confident handling for a half-ton pickup. I chose not to push it due to a lack of electronic aids and the age of a couple of the tires, but there’s a pleasing absence of flexing and queasiness typical of large body-on-frame trucks.
Audio/Accessories: 6/10 — The original CD player sounded adequate but the newly installed Chrysler CD/cassette head unit is surprisingly crisp and clear. Mids and lows are a bit muddy but highs soar through with ease. It’s certainly a big step above typical factory radios from GM and Ford. Controls are laid out logically and intelligently and the switchgear feels substantial and chunky.
There is, otherwise, a total lack of accessories or options which in turn reduce weight and repair costs. Featured: CD, cassette, ice cold air conditioning, powerful heat, driver and passenger air bag, rear ABS. Absent: Power doors, power locks, power mirrors, power seats, front ABS, traction control, stability control, rollover protection, four-wheel drive, telematics, navigation, and the list goes on and on. Of course, having all of those features would significantly increase the price.
The most noteworthy absence is cruise control.
Interior: 6/10 — There’s hard plastic everywhere but most of it feels tightly assembled and very durable. Nothing rattles or shakes. The only flaw, and a rather significant one, is the brittle dashboard top, covered now with an aftermarket cap.
The center seat has a massive arm rest that folds down and opens to reveal a large storage compartment, large enough to fit a tablet or small computer. Additionally, storage pockets behind the seats are capable of swallowing suitcases, tool boxes, and shopping bags. Even the space underneath the seats provide a surprising volume of storage. It’s a clever way of using a limited space.
A slightly larger glove box would have been nice, though the spacious center storage more than makes up the difference.
The front bench seat is wide enough for me to lay across and take a nap.
Two of the world’s greatest cupholders pop out from the center stack with adjustable arms to fit any can, cup, or mug.
Comfort: 8/10 – A dead pedal would be nice, but the driver’s chair is nearly tall enough to sit perfectly upright. A lack of cruise control can result in sore ankles and knees for some, but for the most part its absence just a nuisance, particularly on flat interstates. Additional lumbar support would be nice as well, something that could be remedied with a small pillow, otherwise the front bench seat is reasonably supportive and comfortable.
Quality/Reliability: 6.5/10 — After 105,000 miles, not one thing inside or out shook, rattled, or vibrated. Despite the hard plastics on the door and dashboard, everything felt well-assembled and durable. Even the manual windows operated quickly with few rotations required.
The pull handle mounted on the A-pillar has been replaced once — my friend’s very short mom used it to lift herself into the cabin on a daily basis. And the dashboard cracks were quite a disappointment, remedied for cheap thanks to aftermarket solutions.
As with many Chrysler products, the automatic transmission is a common concern, but this one was recently serviced with proper Chrysler ATF and a fresh filter. The 3.7L V6 is well reputed while the 45RFE is known to be a fairly stout transmission. Because this truck was equipped with a towing package, the transmission cooling was upgraded which should help significantly with longevity.
The steering and suspension are unusually tight and trouble-free for 100,000 miles.
At the moment, the only services required are brake pads and rotors and a new radiator (just ordered for $96 at Radiatorbarn.com), which recently sprung a leak. There are no oil, power steering, or ATF leaks whatsoever.
On a rainy day, I unfortunately learned that the defrost function was broken. The flap in the dashboard no longer functions, caused by cheap plastic hinges that break over time. The repair at a Dodge dealer would be well over $1000, requiring removal of the dashboard and discharging of the AC refrigerant. The cheaper and far easier solution is a product called Heater Treater, featured on Speed Channel’s “Truck U.” The $120 kit comes with replacement metal flaps that you install by cutting into the HVAC box rather than removing it. Fortunately, there are shops in Missouri willing to do the installation for me.
Overall Value: 8/10 — The Ram is plenty capable of doing work and sufficiently refined for daily driving and road trips. If this was a V8, it would have earned 9/10 overall.
VERDICT: When these were new, V6 Rams came with huge incentives on top of low MSRPs that were already 20 grand, saving thousands of dollars over V8 models. Now that they’ve depreciated, the price difference between a V6 and V8 is minor, as is the difference in fuel economy. The V6 is a perfectly adequate engine for daily driving but get a V8 if you can, especially if you plan on towing.
A decade ago, I worked in a call center and kept a stack of magazines at my desk to retain some sanity. I gleaned over the pages of Automobile Magazine and Car and Driver, obsessing over the Marauder’s promise of sporty motoring in a car the size of Alaska.
That’s always been the challenge of any sport sedan — finding a balance between comfort and sport while using clever suspension tuning and technology to allow a land yacht to simulate the reflexes of a speed boat.
The 302hp 4.6L Marauder compares closely to Chevrolet’s rear-drive, full-size 1996 Impala SS, reaching 60 mph in 7.5 seconds and the quarter-mile in 15.5s @ 91 mph. The 260hp, 5.7L, LT1-powered Impala was just over a half-second faster.
The Marauder’s “Panther” platform traces its roots to 1978, making it the longest-running architecture in American history — that’s 32 years of production that finally ended in September 2011. The Mercury brand itself quietly disappeared in early 2011. Once a large-volume brand with 360,000 units sold in 2000, it quietly fell to 93,000 in 2010. Of the 155,000 Mercury Grand Marquis sedans sold in 2003 and 2004, just over 10,000 were Marauders, a take rate of about 7%.
Critics may be eager to deem the Marauder a flop, but like the 1994-1996 Impala SS which was based on the Caprice, the Marauder was a performance trim level for an existing car, in this case the Mercury Grand Marquis. Considering the low development costs, the only major expenses were sales and marketing. So, despite the Marauder’s rarity, it was a profitable venture for the Mercury brand.
Differences from the Grand Marquis include the 4.6L DOHC V8 borrowed from the Ford Mustang Mach 1 with 302hp (compared to MGM’s 239hp), a monochromatic exterior, Mercury-specific chrome wheels with special wheel caps, an upper storage console and information center, perforated leather, Autometer analog oil pressure and voltage gauges, real dual exhaust with chrome tips, suspension enhancements to control body motion, and a limited-slip 3.55:1 differential. 2003 was also the year Ford introduced rack-and-pinion steering and fully-boxed frames with hydroformed rails to the entire Crown Victoria/Grand Marquis/Town Car lineup.
Compared to the Impala SS, the Marauder was stiffer, quieter, safer, and more refined. Of course, that’s expected for a car introduced to the market nearly a decade later. For a brand that did little beyond rebadging Nissans (Villager), Fords (Mountaineer, Sable), and Mazdas (early Tracer), the Marauder was a tremendous leap forward for Mercury.
And despite comparisons to the long-discontinued B-body Caprice, the Marauder’s stiffest and most direct competition at $35,000 came from a new breed of premium family cars including the Nissan Maxima and Chrysler 300C. The market for “almost-luxury” cars had become terribly congested and Mercury, with its aging platform and stodgy image, had difficulty winning over import buyers with arguably more sophisticated tastes.
Then in 2004, the second and final year of the Marauder’s production, Cadillac introduced the CTS-V, a “breakthrough” that raised standards for American (and later German) performance sedans. The Marauder was history.
Let’s talk about how it drives.
I flew to Minnesota in July for a Cadillac owners meet and the Car Craft Summer Nationals Car Show. Chad, a longtime friend and fellow fanatic of luxury cars, recently traded his 2000 Buick Regal GS for a 2003 Mercury Marauder. The Regal served his needs faultlessly and dependably but lacked the size, heft, and substantive feel of a full size car.
He picked me up from the Minneapolis airport Friday night. The first thing I noticed was the presence of an upper storage console with an information display.
You also get the added bonus of two Autometer gauges in the center console for oil pressure and voltage.
The rest of the dashboard, except for the white-faced gauges, was standard Crown Victoria/Grand Marquis.
When I climbed in I was impressed by the soft and supple leather seating. There was nothing taxi-like about it. With three of us stretched across the back bench, it was decent room for an airport ride, though leg room was somewhat lacking considering the extended length of the car.
The following afternoon, Chad handed me the keys and allowed me to take it for a spin, a nice day for marauding.
EXTERIOR
Compared to the Grand Marquis, the Marauder is dramatically dechromed, favoring a menacing monochromatic theme over traditional American brightwork. Nothing outside says “Marauder” except for the embossed letters on the rear bumper cover.
Without taking notice of the chrome wheels or dual exhaust tips, most laymen would assume the Marauder was a police car or a pensioner’s means of conveyance. Though that may seem like a critique of its subtle styling, it’s perfect for a sleeper sedan.
INTERIOR
The analog odometer is a dead giveaway to the aging platform and lack of modern technology. But that’s fine, because the Marauder is well-equipped with power seats, power windows, power adjustable pedals, side-impact airbags, and five-star front- and side-impact crash ratings from the NHTSA.
Despite being a traditional body-on-frame car, the Marauder’s top-tier crash scores beat several large unibody cars including the Chrsler 300M, Buick Lesabre, Pontiac Bonneville, and Toyota Avalon. So, despite the Marauder’s numerous anachronisms, it’s actually safer than most cars on the road.
Additionally, Mercury has enjoyed top-tier rankings over the past decade in JD Power’s Initial Quality and Vehicle Dependability surveys.
The dated dashboard screams “I MISS CHUMBAWUMBA!” with its 90s-inspired round shapes and mix of plastics, but there’s nothing actually wrong with any of it. The large vents are positioned perfectly to cool driver and passenger faces and simulated aluminum trim with machined detailing adorns the surface from ear to ear.
Seating is unique to the Marauder with thick side bolsters and a Roman Mercury “God’s Head” logo sewn into the seat backs, the only appearance of this classic logo in any Mercury product since the 1950s.
Above is a center storage console with a compass, fuel information, and overhead lights. This extended-length console was specific to 2003 as it was shortened in ’04 to accommodate a moonroof.
The Marauder’s better-than-basic sound system doesn’t come with special branding or high-tech features but it does fill the cabin with plenty of bump and thump. That’s a colloquial way of saying that even though there isn’t a JBL or Bose system to brag to your friends about, it’s powerful enough to drown out your inner thoughts.
Unfortunately, the standard Ford head unit looks plain and well-aged. The four unpleasant looking holes in the front, seen on every Ford radio since forever ago, are designed to accommodate removal tools, as if all owners were expected to dump their factory radios in favor of aftermarket equipment. On the plus side, it’s easy to use with well-spaced and well-labeled rocker buttons, a large text display with bright green segments, and a large volume knob with redundant controls on the steering wheel.
Further differentiating the Marauder from the ‘Grandma Marquis’ is a floor-mounted shifter, a muscle car requirement that also introduces two useful cupholders and an arm rest with storage underneath.
And thankfully, since I have short legs, the Marauder comes with a feature pioneered by Mercury — power adjustable pedals. One push moves the pedals forward or backward for maximum comfort, a nice way to maintain a safe distance from the steering wheel.
Further enhancing comfort are eight-way power adjustable front seats with heat. The adjustment switches are mounted on the door in an arrangement that logically mimics the shape of the seat, similar to what you would find in a Mercedes-Benz. In 1989, Infiniti applied this configuration to the Q45 luxury sedan but changed back to standard buttons when Mercedes-Benz sent a cease and desist letter.
This apparently didn’t stop Mercury.
The rest of the knobs, buttons, and switches feel heavy and substantial and respond to input with a firm and audible click.
DRIVING IMPRESSIONS
WHOA. One light touch of the throttle induces off-the-line acceleration that throws your skull into the headrest; Mercury clearly intended for the Marauder to be a stop light drag racer. Though the sticky tires [this one has a set of Coopers] are unlikely to break traction and create a cloud of smoke, they offer a smooth ride with little road noise and a clean delivery of power from the wheels to the pavement.
Shifts arrive sharply and promptly when called for while behaving with peaceful civility during casual motoring.
As the tach needle jumped effortlessly to 4000 rpm I immediately noted comparisons to Cadillac’s Northstar V8.
Ford’s DOHC 4.6 and Cadillac’s 4.6L Northstar V8 both produce 300 horsepower but deliver in dramatically different ways. Cadillacs tend to be slower off the line while building power at higher revs, pulling hard well beyond 100 mph. The Marauder’s DOHC engine, part of Ford’s long line of modular V8s, prefers to deliver the bulk of its power between 2000 and 4000 rpm while tapering off a bit at higher revs.
The Marauder will handily beat a Cadillac Seville STS off the line but the Seville would catch up to the Marauder by the end of the block or quarter mile. On the highway from a rolling start, the Seville offers more passing power on up to triple-digit speeds.
But that’s the difference between an Autobahn cruiser sold in European markets [the Cadillac] and an American muscle car sold in North America [the Mercury]. Both cars were developed in Detroit but serve differing needs and tastes.
The Marauder’s perforated steering wheel offers excellent grip and the two-spoke carryover from Lincoln comes with a plethora of climate, cruise, and audio controls. Unfortunately, the old-fashioned layout lacks a modern, sporty look. That’s fine, because it’s easy to find a comfortable place to rest your hands at highway cruising speeds and the buttons are raised so you can keep your eyes on the road. Looks old, works well.
Steering effort is on the lighter side for comfort but feedback is more than sufficient, offering a precise and direct sense of control thanks to the new rack and pinion system. Front-drive Cadillacs, on the other hand, can sometimes feel artificially heavy at high speeds.
Even base-model Crown Victorias are reasonably enjoyable to throw around corners. Typical Crown Vics are soft and wobbly, yes, but feel reasonably secure thanks to the sense of balance created by placing the drive wheels in the back.
Front-wheel-drive Cadillacs, on the other hand, while arguably more capable at the limit thanks to their mix of high-tech gadgets and electronic aids, rarely offer that “in the pocket” feel where the driver is at the center of gravity with the car rotating around him. So, even though the Marauder’s body leans a little bit, it still feels light on its feet. It also helps that the Marauder’s suspension components are mounted outside the frame, giving the car a more planted feel than a Grand Marquis or Crown Victoria.
And it truly is a novelty in itself to be able to drive such a massive chunk of car as if it was dramatically smaller.
Ride quality is superb without feeling disconnected. I’ve driven the standard Grand Marquis which shares some of the Lincoln Town Car’s feeling of disconnection from the road surface. The Marauder, however, is sturdy and planted without the sensation of floating on air. And yes, the rear suspension does have air ride for load leveling.
After a decade of fawning over this car in the pages of magazines, it lived up to my expectations in real life. I don’t know who Mercury was gunning for — was it old guys with money and fond memories of youth or young up-and-comers who never lived in the muscle car era but had a sense of nostalgia inspired by movies and television? I suppose after nearly a decade of being out of production it doesn’t matter. This blunt-object sedan may not have found much of an audience but when evaluated on its own, it’s one heck of a way to travel.
Overall, the Marauder is quick, surprisingly nimble, and offers a near-perfect mix of civility and comfort. Whatever technological sophistication it may lack is more than made up for by its safety, dependability, good fun, and good looks.
Powertrain: 9/10 — The DOHC 4.6 is pleasingly smooth, never coarse or unpleasant even at high revs. The dual exhaust is tuned for extra feedback but never penetrates the cabin in a way that’s cacophonic or unpleasant. The throttle can be a bit touchy.
More power throughout the rev range would be a welcome addition. The Marauder’s menacing styling seems to suggest that it has 350-400hp. Fortunately, the Modular V8 has wide aftermarket support.
Still, as-is, the Marauder moves briskly and without hestitation.
Braking: 7/10 — The pedal is a bit soft as Fords tend to be but brake feel is progressive without being too touchy. They’re easy to modulate and require little effort in heavy traffic.
Ventilated front and rear discs resist fade during spirited driving or while descending mountain passes.
Ride: 8.8/10 — Body-on-frame construction is often praised for isolating the cabin from the road, great for luxury cars but a negative for sport sedans. Somehow, the Marauder strikes a nice balance between keeping the cabin quiet and steady without disconnecting the driver from the road surface. Praise goes to both the suspension and revised steering.
Steering/Handling: 8.8/10 – Front and rear stabilizer bars, new rack and pinion steering, Tokico shocks, and a fully boxed frame with hydroformed rails contribute to surprisingly nimble handling for such a heavy car. Steering is accurate without being uncomfortably heavy in the hands and comfortable without being loose or imprecise.
Audio/Accessories: 8/10 — The sound system is perfectly adequate with redundant controls on the steering wheel for climate, audio, and cruise. Radio and digital automatic climate controls are easy enough to use with large buttons and bright displays. Most functions are easy to see, use, and reach with switchgear that feels substantial. The center overhead console is a nice touch.
Interior: 8/10 — The interiors of Panther cars were designed for taxi and police duty and as a result they last a long time and wear well. The layout and design look dated but remain functional and user-friendly.
Cargo space is commodious. If you filled the trunk with water, you’d have an Olympic-sized swimming pool.
Comfort: 9/10 – Additional side bolsters help with cornering but may not be firm enough for anyone interested in autocrossing or other amateur motorsports. Padding is generous with thick hides of leather. Front leg and knee room is generous thanks to the wide cabin but rear seat leg room is a bit limited for such a large car.
Quality/Reliability: 8.5/10 — Marauder, Navigator, and Mustang owners suggest modifying the engine to improve rear cylinder cooling. The electrical systems and driveline components are generally known to be dependable. The transmission was beefed up for 2004. Body integrity is excellent. See info.
Overall Value: 9/10 — The combination of reliability, safety, rarity, comfort, performance, and style make the Marauder a desirable car. The only compromises are fuel economy (though reasonable for a 4200 lb V8 sedan) and rear leg room which should be greater for such a long car.
VERDICT: As a used car, the Marauder is a solid choice. The working-class good looks come with first-class seating and a V8 as sonorous and smooth as anything on the market.
SPECIFICATIONS:
4.6L 32V DOHC V8
302 hp @ 5750 rpm
318 ft-lbs. @ 4250 rpm
Curb weight: 4165 lbs
Length: 211.9 in.
Wheel base: 114.7 in.
Rear wheel drive
4-speed automatic
Limited slip 3.55:1 rear differential
Independent front struts
Rear air assist
EPA fuel economy: 15/21 mpg
Update:
I shamefully neglected to take any pictures of the engine. I blame the weather for my eagerness to get into an air conditioned environment. Here’s a snapshot from Familycar.com:
